Communicate to Connect | Leader's Beacon

Posted on 03 April 2012.

?Good communicators are open to my ideas. They respect me. They know who they are and what makes them ?tick? and they want to know the same about me. They foster my growth while attending to their own. They are proud of their accomplishments and of mine-for our mutual benefit.?? A Get Along seminar participant

Isn?t it a thrill to talk with people who are great listeners, who hear every word you speak, and who understand exactly what you say?

Have you ever received outstanding treatment by a customer representative who handled your situation with such amazing grace, whowent so far beyond the call of duty to resolve your problem, that he or she far exceeded your expectations?

Have you experienced meeting someone who seemed to be so much on your wavelength and so responsive to what you wanted that they earned your trust almost immediately?

High-quality connections are truly magical! No question about it-the ability to be on someone?s wavelength, to be in tune with each other?s needs, and to clearly communicate ideas is the lifeblood of quality connections.

To create them, you must take care to constantly monitor the quality of your communications.

Good communication is a balance of honoring your own needs as well as the needs of others. Building and maintaining positive connections means getting to the heart of what people want and need, as represented by the acronym HEART. . These qualities help to cultivate respect, and build positive and productive relationships by respecting our mutual needs to be:

Heard and honored.

We want to be heard and to have our ideas and feelings honored. When others are attentive and truly listen to our thoughts, opinions, and feelings, and seek to understand our perspectives, we feel validated. Being heard and honored provides a supportive, compassionate environment in which we feel safe to express our truth.

Encouraged and empowered.

We want to feel encouraged and empowered in our relationships, not discouraged and drained. Encouragement is fostered through an atmosphere of supportive connections and builds confidence in our capabilities, sustains us through challenges, and helps us to achieve our personal goals and desired outcomes. We?re empowered within the flow of positive energy which enhances the expression of excellence in our attitudes and actions.

Appreciated and accepted.

We feel valued when we?re acknowledged for our time, energy, creativity, talent, and other contributions; showing appreciation boosts positive feelings in others and helps create positive environments. We also want to be accepted as unique individuals, which includes being respected for our personal beliefs and values.

Respected and recognized.

Respect is an attitude communicated through verbal and nonverbal behaviors, which is extended and maintained through positive communication patterns. We also want to be recognized for our contributionsof time, talent, energy, and other resources, which nurtures healthy self-esteem.

Trusted and treasured.

The ability to trust others is critical for establishing and sustaining relationships of integrity. We trust the individuals, businesses, and institutions that consistently uphold their commitments. We also want to feel treasured for who we are and what we bring to a relationship.

These qualities help to produce positive work and living environments, enhance credibility, inspire cooperation, encourage effort, and more-all vital for creating, solidifying, and maintaining enduring connections.

The above is based on the book, ?Get Along with Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere? by Arnold Sanow and Sandra Strauss

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